Handbook of a Healthy Muslim Marriage – Book Review

Title: Handbook of a Healthy Muslim Marriage

Author: Abdur-Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera

Genre:  Islamic Marriage Guide/Fiqh of Nikāḥ 

Pages: 262

Publisher: White Thread Press (London)

Year of publication:  2019 (1st edition)

This is by far the best book I have seen on the subject. Among the few generally available in the market, some of which I have previously browsed through, this one stands out for its depth, genuineness, scholarship, and the author’s many years of experience as an imām, marriage counselor, mentor, muftī, and academic. It is thoroughly referenced with classical Islamic works and mainstream sources, featuring a highly skillful fusion of Islamic-academic principles and practical realities. The book comprises 262 pages of essential advice for those planning to get married and those who are already married (including those who have been married for a long time). I only read it because I received it as a random gift. A quick glance at the contents page piqued my curiosity to read some sections, which then led me to read more—eventually completing the entire book.

As with his other books, Shaykh Dr. Abdur-Rahman Mangera has produced a high-quality work that is impressively researched. It is evident that he has invested considerable time in authoring this book. The breadth of classical Islamic Arabic references of tafsīr, ḥadīth, and fiqh that he has accessed, coupled with his years of experience and understanding of contemporary challenges—particularly in our modern troubled world where the institution of marriage and the family unit is increasingly becoming obsolete, at least in the Western world—makes this a fascinating read. He explores and shares his knowledge and experience of the good, bad, and ugly regarding marriage. Topics range from laws of marriage (fiqh/aḥkām al-nikāḥ) to conducting the nikah ceremony, marriage preparation, criteria and qualities to seek in a spouse, the actual search for the ideal spouse, wedding customs and practices, dealing with in-laws, privacy and intimacy, having and raising children, the Western perspective on multiple wives (up to four at any time, to be precise), marital difficulties—including disputes between spouses, financial problems, emotional challenges, differences in outlook and life priorities, infertility, domestic violence, the complex issue of ṭalāq (divorce), and complications even when parting ways as a last resort—and much more.

In addressing these numerous topics, the author critically analyzes various cultural norms, values, and practices. He presents some personal views that other scholars may not fully endorse or might articulate differently.

The book concludes on an uplifting note—the husband and wife in Jannah. Overall, it is an excellent and highly beneficial read, especially for those hoping to marry or still in the first decade of their marriage.

– Reviewed by: Abu Asim Badrul Islam
Northampton, England
14 Jumād al-Ᾱkhirah 1445/28 December 2023